My housemate has discovered a new flavour in instant porridge – and just the thing for those chilly early mornings. It’s hazelnut – with just a hint of golden syrup. Mmmmmmmmm. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. I love it. And so does our dog. (Stares. Give me some of that human food. Stares. I really like it. Stares. […]

It’s an emergency! Whatever – I’m having my lunch. While eating at one of Collins Street West’s finer dining establishments yesterday, we heard the alert siren go off over the PA system. (The one they always use for the tests.) Hmmm, a test. The alarm seemed barely to register with the throng. Staff kept serving. […]

For some months now, via a friend in Canberra, I’ve been following the fortunes of a gold rimmed ‘Murchison Bowling Club’ glass which has graced the shelves of ‘Revolve’ – a junk shop attached to Canberra tip. Much speculation has ensued regarding the path of said glass from Murchison (a small town in central Victoria […]

Population: You. It’s one of the best lines from ‘The Simpsons’. And truly – the only one I can remember. It’s brought to mind today as I sit here to write about my relationship with my … personal trainer. Adam has been slack lately. He’s just not turning up for the 6.30 am starts. He […]

Foxes, it would appear, have many, varied and contradictory characteristics. I have heard the following expressions recently: ‘Cunning like a fox’; ‘Itchy like a fox’; ‘Foxy like a fox’ and ‘Dumb like a fox’. The week before last I even saw a fox down at Footscray Park although, given the rapidity of its departure from […]

Him: “It’s just one of those things. The man has foibles.” Me: “He has fur balls?” (mind you, it was a crackly telephone line). Him: “Yes. Don’t act so surprised. Human foibles. Everyone has them.” Me: (unsure) “Fur balls?” Him: “Trust me on this one.” Me: (v unsure) “Okaaaaaay.” … Me: “Oh, foibles.” (I think […]

‘Shimmer’ + “Dromedary’ = the new colour scheme in my parents’ kitchen. Ok – now guess what this really means!! Go on. Clue: I was most taken aback when I saw it. True to form my parents coincided the application of the new colour scheme with a convenient holiday when they were assured at least […]

The days are getting shorter and the nights are a bit cooler and we’re clearly heading into a change of season. Consequently, I decided to go through my stockpile of hosiery (as opposed to my stockpile of weapons of mass destruction) and decide what stays and what gets knotted together into a superb tug-of-war toy […]